I know I cannot be the person that is noticing this new trend that is taking place in romance novels. Lately it seems every book I read the leading man is controlling and mildly possessive.
I have never been one to pick a work of fiction apart. I also make a point not to judge a book based on what would happen in the “real world". I usually take fiction for what it is, a made up story. I think that is why I have been falling head over heels for these controlling men in every story that I read, it’s just harmless fiction. At least that is the excuse I am going to use.
I am normally all for girl power and urging girls to leave that jerk when I even hear telltale of a controlling man, so I am not sure what has come over me. Deep down I want to be like "hell no girl, ***** slept with two other woman? Dump that loser"; (the stars are to avoid spoilers if you haven't read the book I am referencing). What ends up happening instead is I am totally rooting for the girl to take him back!! UGH!! What's wrong with me?
What? The man is tracking her cell phone to a bar and stalking her to pick her up? Why is it that I am finding this hot!! As much as I want to be like "Really? You're going for that guy? You need your head checked", I do the exact opposite. I end up barreling through the pages falling in love with these jerks.
I'd be lying if I said a guy going through whatever means possible to get the girl he wants wasn't hot; as odd as it is I find it romantic. I can't believe I typed those words!! It is so embarrassing, but it's true. Having a guy do whatever it takes no matter how creepy to win me over is the new aged fairy tale... and I am sadly a sucker for it. I'd also be lying if I said having a guy knockout another guy for talking to me because he was so jealous wasn't hot. Hearing the words "You're Mine" just makes my heart go pitter-patter and I know it's so wrong.
On the other end of the spectrum I can understand why some women aren’t into this new trend. I wish I was one of them but I am weak. I really want to hear from you on this. Are you for or against this new trend? Why or why not?
Sincerely,
Sick in the head
well note to self, start koing guys for talking to a girl i like,, stalk, and tell bitches their mine after fucking their friends. This should be much funner then the old fashion way of being a gentleman : )
ReplyDeleteOh Gosh hearing it like that makes it sound so much worse!! But I can't help it... I am into these books. I may be losing my marbles.
ReplyDeleteOh man this isn't a new trend at ALL lol Go back and read romance from the 70's through the early 90's if you want some stalkerish, possessive, domineering heroes! It wasn't until the mid-90's that heroines in general stopped being quite so wishy-washy and started actually being able to be strong characters in and of themselves -- the market simply wouldn't stand for it.
ReplyDeleteSeriously though, I think this is a prime example of why romance appeals to me so much as a genre of fiction. I can indulge in mooning over someone whose behavior would, in real life, have me slapping him with a restraining order or even punching him in the mouth, rather than inviting him into my boudoir.
I think for many women, there's a primitive thrill to being the target of a strong, possessive, controlling, Me-Tarzan-You-Jane type of male, especially when said male is sexually potent, and as I said before, romantic fiction is often a healthier, or at least safer, place to indulge in that than in "real" life, hence the recent re-emergence of this trend.
Never be ashamed of your book boyfriends ;)
I am not a fan if it gets too stalkerishly creepy, but no judgement from me for those who enjoy the books. :)
ReplyDeleteYou are not alone, add 1 more to the "sick in head" group! I love these romance stories. I find that the women do always have strength/control in their own lives in some way but the idea of them being "swept off their feet" is just a fun fantasy to jump into/escape to from the day to day world. I will keep reading unashamedly.
ReplyDeleteI like them to an extent. I love Beautiful Disaster, but Travis was INSANE and scared me. If I was Abby I would have run for the hills. But I did fall for so many other controlling possessive characters. Yet when I dated someone who was like that in real life I hated it and dumped them. So maybe like you said because it's fiction it's fun? Also, I think too because books don't go past the ending of the series. Like I wish we could see Anna and Christian Grey years later when she decides enough is enough and divorces him haha. Or When Bella decides maybe she shouldn't have given up mortality quite so soon. I think because we just see "happy endings" it makes girls think that's an attractive quality. I'm right there with you though. I love it in books.
ReplyDeleteI love those men in books, but I have also dated men like that when I was younger. In the beginning it is great, it seems like they care so much and want to keep you safe. Somewhere along the line that changes and they are telling you who you can talk to, what to wear and such. I had many fights with them over things because eventually, I realized that I don't need a dad, I am an adult.
ReplyDeleteHowever, in the books that I read, the men seem to change for the better. They trust their woman and compromise. I guess that is why they get their HEA.
My hubby isn't like this at all. We do things with and without each other. I love it! :)
Great post!
I'm for the new trend, but I'm not always in love with each of the new alpha man heroes. I like the characters to show that they can make adjustments and try to improve themselves for the ladies... you know, "work on their issues." Plus, I like it when the woman counterpart can hold her own with the alpha man, she can submit, but she doesn't have to submit ALL the time... I think that's part of why Gideon and Eva from Bared & Reflected in You are my favorites. I like the women who make those alphas work for it ;) Book Savvy Babe
ReplyDeleteOnce upon a time, I could see the tragic romantic elements in that. Who doesn't want to be loved that much? I found myself a fella like that once, and he quickly cured me of indulging in "controlling guy" fantasies. I just posted about it yesterday on my writer blog, if you want to read it. http://henrycircle.blogspot.com/2013/02/the-worst-boy.html
ReplyDeleteYou are not alone Danielle, I swear, I think I am getting worse with every book I read. The more controlling and "creepy" the more I am so on board and cussing out the woman if she doesn't fall for him right away. And as a single person who does date occasionally, this could be a problem lol. But so far none of my real life beaus have been close to my fictional beaus!
ReplyDeleteI am with you on this one. I made some of my friends read BD and they said to me "he's such an a-hole why do you like this book?" That being said, these girls aren't crazy bookworms like me, and I don't know if they are able to separate fiction from real life. Or if, like you said, I'm crazy. I am all "you go girl" and consider myself a strong women, but in my books I like an alpha male type. If that makes me unstable than I can live with that :-)
ReplyDeleteIt's perfectly normal. Despite how much effort is put into redefining gender roles, it's still kinda hard wired into your genetics. Evolutionary psychology will tell you that a woman's biological desire is a strong dominant man. Only in recent decades have they tried to paint a man who puts his foot down as an insecure, abusive, male-chauvinistic pig. There's a difference between a man only dominating you (and being a pushover for everyone else in the real world) and a man who is genuinely dominant and strong (alpha male material). That's why when a woman is with a weak man something inside her just won't feel right, and she'll find herself helplessly flirting with more dominant men when given the chance.
ReplyDelete